MOCKING SMILE

a mask within a mask,
a smile feeling shy inside it,
a smile that hides all the remorse,


I opened my mask to reveal yet another within it,
Shocked I ripped it to find a faint smile inside the inner mask,
A smile that was mocking on me.
Unknowingly knowing the shock I got from this play of my own faces.


A face that’s always dead,
another that’s most vibrant.
And yet within all this a true face with a mocking smile.


I was getting used to this long forgotten face of mine,
But definitely this smile wasn’t there when last time I saw my maskless face.
Though I never realised when I put on the masks.
One by one.


I’m a bit sceptical to meet people with this mocking smile of mine,
How they may take it,
Will they laugh,
Will they hate,
Will they love.


How does it matter what people may think about me,
Whats important is that I’m knowingly hating it
and unknowingly admiring it in the mirror,
I tried to speak to it but my new face won’t budge from that mocking smile.
Few passer-by saw me talking to myself,
found it funny.


I had to stop my dialogue,
since people were finding it funny.
As days passed this smile was getting on to my nerves,
everytime I tried knowing the reason for the smile.
People would embarrass and make me leave things midway.


Time was passing by
More and more was I anxious to know the reason why.
Finally I gave up and talked and talked to the smiling face of mine,
People came and left thinking me to be insane.
Days passed by I was still talking,
People were laughing at me.
Somehow no more was I worried about people around
Everyday surely I would spend some time talking to the face,
I never got an answer back but a slight change of attitude towards me.


No more of mockery but a lively breathing smile.
We forgot about the masks,
We forgot the people,
Or maybe the people forgot us.


No more of my questions,
All I would do is talk to the face,
Days became months
And months became years
I started walking and living with the face.


Life became beautiful,
Days became gorgeous,
Nights became charming,


One day in my room I heard a voice,
Looked around to see a mirror,
and in the mirror saw a me,
no more different from my smile,
as happy as could be,
this time the mirror spoke to me.


Spoke to me about the pain I had given,
the pain when I never spoke to him,
the pain of seeing me embarrassed about being my true self.
and every time I gave him the pain,
He would smile back at me.